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The Chris Chandler Show

  • The Muse and Whirled Retort 2024

    The Muse and Whirled Retort October 2024

    THE MUSE AND WHIRLED RETORT

    Hey Everybody,

    It’s that time again. Greetings from back in Austin, TX. Wow, what a summer of terrific shows, festivals and creating art! And we have saved the best for last!

    click on image for tickets

    The Kerrville Folk Festival’s “Welcome Home Fest!” Paul Benoit and I will be appearing on Thursday October 10 with a full band and a fresh repertoire designed to reach the rank and file rabble yearning to be roused. I will also be sitting in with my old pal Dan Bern. It’s going to be a blast.

    Click on image

    I am so happy to have been able to do this for 35 plus years now!

    I plan to make it 40.

    If you would like a copy of the book I put out this summer celebrating 35 years on the road

    you can get it right here:

    You can get other Books and CDs here:

    Click on image

    My heart goes out to those who have lost so much during Huricane Helene, many of whom are close personal friends. I am so sorry for your loss, it makes my troubles seem trivial.

    That said, I gotta say being this kind of artist is starting to take a toll. I live in Austin, and paying Austin rent on a storytellers salary is tough.

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    Yes, since the pandemic, I have been supplementing my ummm... lucrative storytelling income as a stage hand.

    Here is a little video I made about the stagehands. Please check it out and while you are there please subscribe. I am just a few subscriptions away from being able to monetize my channel.

    Yes, I am proud to say every nickel I have ever made has been on or around the stage. I even joined the union IATSE Local 205, but I am still not making ends meet. I am not complaining, it’s just a reality. Thank you for listening. Being an artist is hard. I have never been late on my rent in my life but I am this month.

    So here is a couple of things I am planning. I am looking for a cheaper place to live here in or near Austin. If you or anyone you know, may have such a place please drop me a line.

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    Also, I plan to resume the poem of the week starting soon. That was a nice little way for me to perform for you remotely and give you a chance to help support the arts. Every trickle of income stream helps right now. no, I am not looking for a handout but asking for support in putting out this news letter and driving town to town to wax the manefesto electric. So...

    If you would like to give anything on a regular basis - the cost of a cup of coffee a month really really helps.

    I have a Patreon account.

    You can also donate directly via PayPal and Venmo https://venmo.com/u/thechrischandlershow

    ************

    Paul and I are both going to be in Austin for the next couple of weeks and if you would like to have us play a last minuite house concert any where within an easy strike of Austin - such as well... Austin, Houston, San Antonio, Galveston, please drop me a line as well.

    ************

    Enough, Enough of the crass commercial announcements. Sheeze I only came here for

    T.H.E. .M.U.S.E. .A.N.D. .W.H.I.R.L.E.D. .R.E.T.O.R.T.

    Austin, Texas

    October 04, 2024

    Know Exit

    By Chris Chandler

    Yes, my favorite holiday is Halloween.
    Because,
    Halloween is about
    listening for your own doors to be rapped upon
    and then
    handing out rewards
    to the ones
    that haunt you
    the most.
    ~
    Conversely,
    Halloween is not about finding the right costume.
    It is about dreaming
    of what you might become
    and then acting upon it,
    and then rapping upon the doors of total strangers
    for the sole purpose
    of being rewarded for your efforts.
    ~
    I’ve always felt if you come across a particular door to open,
    you prolly ougta open it,
    otherwise that door
    will haunt you the remainder of your days.
    ~
    There are those that walk through this life
    pointing out the doors we can go through.
    The ones that hold the door open.
    The literal doormen of the unconscious.
    The ones checking IDs or ids.
    No ego.
    Holding the door open
    and collecting the universal cover-charge.
    ~
    Some doors open and close like seasons
    that lead the way to new horizons and time zones.
    The doors of life are painful
    for what you are to become is a process
    of shedding what you have been.
    ~
    I remember being in a grocery store parking lot,
    in Toronto I think it was.
    There were four lanes of heavy traffic zooming past the intersection…
    I saw a break in the traffic…
    or at least I considered it a break…
    ~
    I gunned it to through the sound of car horns,
    screeching car tires,
    skidding breaks
    and the sight of normally polite Canadians
    uncharacteristically giving me the finger,
    not to mention the sound of an irate Anne Feeney
    screaming… “Didn’t you see that sign?”
    “Which sign?”
    “The one that clearly read ‘DO NOT ENTER’”
    “Yes, I saw it.”
    “But you decided to do it anyway?”
    “What do you mean?
    I wasn’t entering.
    I was exiting.”
    ~
    Every entrance way is an exit and every exit is an entrance.
    ~
    Perhaps that is why Emerson said, “Be an opener of doors.”
    ~
    It is the opening of the door that is the key,
    not the key that opens the door.
    ~
    And once you go through that door,
    neither you nor the world you have entered
    will ever be the same
    again.
    ~
    You will indeed be wiser
    but somehow less confident,
    happier, humbler, filled with regret, remorse,
    yet better equipped to understand
    the boundless mysteries that lie ahead.
    ~
    I always ask my fellow commuters
    along the toll road of perpetuity
    “What broke your heart so bad
    that you had to close every door,
    and never fixed the doorbell?”
    ~
    One kind word can grant you the heavens.
    For it is a kind word, and a kind word alone
    that will open the doors you truly want opened.
    Those doors are attached to a wall,
    which is attached to a floor,
    which actually is
    the ground upon which we walk.
    ~
    Be an opener of doors.
    ~
    Prove that Chivalry is not dead…
    ~
    And by doing so…
    You will be next contestant on
    “The Life is Right.”
    ~
    And you alone will have the power
    to show us all
    just what
    is behind
    door number one.
    ~
    ***************
    Once again, Paul and I are both going to be in Austin for the next couple of weeks and if you would like to have us play a last minuite house concert any where within an easy strike of Austin - such as well... Austin, Houston, San Antonio, Galveston, please drop me a line as well.

    We will be at Welcome Home Fest on October 10th.

    Also we will be making a brief apearance at the Hole in the Wall on Thursday October 23 at 6:45

    If you would like to present us for a last minute House concert please drop me a line.

    thanks - Your next news letter will be November 1st.