The Muse and Whirled Retort
Hey everybody,
It’s that time again!
It has been a long road, mostly divided highway since our last little email reunion which took place at The Kerrville Folk Festival, but now I am at The Oregon Country Faire. Some of you may have read that my trusty steed was broken into. Nothing significant was stolen, but their failed attempt to steal it left her wounded and it cost $1200 to get her healthy enough to gallup again. Ouch.
Show business is so glamorous.
That said, I gonna put my crass commercial announcement here.
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Enough! Enough already, with the crass commercial announcements. There will be tour info and other announcements following… but for now it it time time time for your:
T.H.E. .M.U.S.E. .A.N.D. .W.H.I.R.L.E.D. .R.E.T.O.R.T.
July 4, 2023
Veneta, OR
The Road Map of America
By Chris Chandler
The road map of America unfolds before me,
from God‘s own glove compartment.
Used as a napkin to wipe the grease from my chicken fingers,
purchased from the devils old drive-through.
Discarded out the window of want,
and somersaults
past silos and skyscrapers
that materialize upon the horizon,
and then disappear
through the tiny black hole
that is my rearview.
Dogs and horses parade the pasture,
where dogwoods and horsemint bloom.
Urban blight, and rural decay.
Solid, white cotton fields,
like freshly fallen snow,
softening the Carolina landscape.
Picked by illegal immigrants
and shipped to chemical plants in Brazil.
Transformed into the latest poly fiber.
Fifteen percent cotton.
Shipped to Bangladesh,
and sewn into tablecloths
and shipped back to South Carolina
to be stocked up on the shelves of a Walmart
by the very same people
that once worked the textile mills
that lie abandoned
along the thin highways of fat America.
and amber waves of inequity.
Mudflap angels and divisive bumper stickers,
redefine patriotism on the rear bumper of a 1996 Toyota, Tahoe
with a vaxless driver and a West Virginia license plate.
“Honk if you love Jesus,” it reads.
I do so, because I do.
She gives me the finger,
and it makes me love Jesus all the more.
Billboards blaring God guns in Gentlemen’s clubs
fail to see their own irony .
A baseball glove, apple pie, and an A.R. 15.
“Pure American,” it reads.
High heeled, hellcat in fishnets.
“Hot legs always hiring. Beer specials noon to 4 AM. Amateurs and couples welcome,” it reads.
Jesus Christ himself, embossed and start black and white post, social realism style
with bright, red realistic blood dripping from an ash crown of thorns.
“This blood’s for you,” it reads.
Headlights on.
Gas prices as high as the traffic
and my expectations.
Eighteen wheelers lined up at ports of call ferrying prime next day deliveries
past telephone and power-lines.
Rain, refineries and rainbows.
Freshly paved asphalt glistens prismatic
in the Appalachian drizzle.
Road side fireworks fleeting flare.
Half price on the fifth, it’s only fair.
The rocket’s red glare.
The bombs bursting in air.
still floods the airwaves,
on the Fourth of July.
Windshield wipers slapping time
I was holding no one’s had in mine
as I sang every song the radio new.
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A.N.N.O.U.N.C.M.E.N.T.S.
Paul and I are looking forward to our (mostly) North West tour. Dates are below. Paul has a new album coming out ay day now, “The King’s Dream.” Details are at his site: https://www.PaulBenoitMusic.Net
I have put a brief pause on the 5th season of “Your Poem of the Week.” I assure you it will return. I invite you to visit my YouTube Channel where all of seasons three and four are posted as well as much of seasons one and two. I just need a few more subscribers to monitize my channel. (please)
If you are wanting merch here is the latest.
Thanks again for your continued support. I could not do this with out you.
Friday, July 7th, 2023 9:00 PM to 10:30 PM
THE OREGON COUNTRY FAIRE FAIRE SITE STAGE TIMES TBA
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org/
Saturday, July 8th, 2023 12:20 PM to 1:30 PM
THE OREGON COUNTRY FAIRE BLUE MOON STAGE
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org/
Saturday, July 8th, 2023
The Oregon Country Faire Blue Moon Stage 12:20 -1:20
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org
Sunday, July 9th, 2023 3:00 PM to 4:30 PM
THE OREGON COUNTRY FAIRE BLUE MOON STAGE
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org/
Sunday, July 9th, 2023
The Oregon Country Faire Blue Moon Stage 3:00- 4:00
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org/
Sunday, July 9th, 2023 9:00 PM to 10:30 PM
THE OREGON COUNTRY FAIRE TE LIBRARY SHOW
Venita, OR
Website: https://www.oregoncountryfair.org/
Sunday, July 9th, 2023
The Annual unplugged Library Show. A Faire Family Favorite. Dark:30
Saturday, July 15th, 2023
PORTLAND SCOTISH HIGHLAND GAMES MT HOOD CC (W JEN DELYTH)
Portland, OR
Purchase Tickets: For More Info
Saturday, July 22nd, 2023
SEATTLE SCOTTISH HIGHLAND GAMES ENEMCLAW STATE PARK (WITH JEN DELYTH)
Enemclaw, WA
Website: https://www.sshga.org/
Sunday, July 23rd, 2023
SEATTLE SCOTTISH HIGHLAND GAMES ENEMCLAW STATE PARK (WITH JEN DELYTH)
Enemclaw, WA
Website: https://www.sshga.org/
Wednesday, July 26th, 2023 7:00 PM
HOUSE CONCERT IN BELLINGHAM THE HOME OF CARYN SIMMONS
DM me for the addressBellingham, WA
Friday, July 28th, 2023 7:00 PM to 9:00
THE CHRIS CHANDLER AND PAUL BENOIT SHOW RETURN TO SEATTLE! EGAN’S BALLARD JAM HOUSE
1707 NW Market StreetSeattle, WA 98107
Phone: 206-789-1621
Website: http://www.ballardjamhouse.com
Saturday, July 29th, 2023 8:00 PM to 10:00 PM
BLACK CAT CABARET SNAP DRAGON CAFE
17817 VASHON HWY SW
Vashon, WA
Phone: 206-463-1310
Sunday, July 30th, 2023 3:00 PM to 5:00 PM
CHARLES SMITH PRESENTS A HOUSE CONCERT CHUBROCKS BBQ SHACK AND MAN CAVE
15998 Clear Creek RdPoulsbo, WA 98370
Website: https://www.facebook.com/chubrocksbbqshack
Tuesday, August 1st, 2023 7:00 PM to 9:00 PM
CHANDLER AND PAUL LONG AWAITED RETURN TO OLYMPIA LANTERN RECORDS
Olympia, WA
Phone: (360) 402-9055
Website: https://recordstoreday.com/Store/24455
Wednesday, August 2nd, 2023 7:00 PM
THE EASTSIDE CULTURAL SOCIETY PRESENTS A HOUSE CONCERT AT THE HOME OF BROCK NOYES
DM Me for Addressses
Thursday, August 3rd, 2023
THE CHRIS CHANDLER AND PAUL BENOIT SHOW RETURNS TO COTTAGE GROVE THE AXE AND FIDDLE
657 E Main StCottage Grove, OR 97424
Phone: 541-942-5942
Website: https://axeandfiddle.com/
Friday, August 4th, 2023 7:00 PM
EUGENE! TSUNAMI BOOKS
2585 Willamette St.
Eugene, OR 97405
Phone: 541-349-8986
Price: $15.00
Website: http://www.tsunamibooks.org/
Saturday, August 5th, 2023 7:00 PM
HOUSE CONCERT IN PORTLAND HOME OF DEAN AND ABBY BOUDOURIS
PM me for the address.Portland, OR
Sunday, August 6th, 2023
ASHLAND
INTIMATE HOUSE CONCERT AT THE HOME OF KIRSTEN SCHIPPER
You Will Have to DM Me for the address.Ashland, OR
Wednesday, August 9th, 2023
PAUL AND CHRIS RETURN TO THE NORTH BAY THE LOST CHURCH
between Mendocino Avenue and B StreetSanta Rosa, CA 95401
Phone: 415-320-1408
Website: https://thelostchurch.org/contact/#santa-rosa
Wednesday, August 9th, 2023 8:00 PM
BARFLY CABERET MARTUNIS
4 Valencia StSan Francisco, CA
Website: https://m.facebook.com/pages/category/Cocktail-Bar/Martunis-994554857261865/?_rdr#_=_
As a duo with Paul Benoit and Dawn Oberg
Thursday, August 10th, 2023 8:00 PM
BARFLY CABERET MARTUNI'S
4 Valencia StSan Francisco, CA
Website: https://m.facebook.com/pages/category/Cocktail-Bar/Martunis-994554857261865/?_rdr#_=_
As a duo with Paul Benoit and Dawn Oberg
Friday, August 11th, 2023
THE CHRIS CHANDLER AND PAUL BENOIT SHOW THE MONKEY HOUSE
1638 University AveBerkeley, CA
Website: https://www.themonkeyhouse.org/
Saturday, August 12th, 2023
CHANDLER AND PAUL RETURN TO NEVADA CITY TBA
Nevada City, CA
Sunday, August 13th, 2023 8:00 PM
CHRIS CHANDLER AND PAUL BENOIT RETURN TO SANTA CRUZ THE LIVE OAK GRANGE HALL
1900 17th AveSanta Cruz, CA